WELL, Katy Perry has a lot to answer for in my house this week!
Like most kids these days, my daughter has an iPod. She loves it ...and I hate that she has it. That is of course until she gets in trouble, then it comes in very handy as a disciplinary tool.
This week the iPod remains un-confiscated, so she was happily sitting in her room playing games and listening to music on it. The usual seven-year-old kind of songs I suppose. Taylor Swift, One Direction and of course, Katy Perry.
When I was 7 (yes I am about to show my age) things were a little different.
I had this amazing pink cassette player and loved nothing more than to listen to my Kylie Minogue tape, whilst singing brilliantly into my hairbrush. With the exception of Madonna, whom I wasn't allowed to listen to, songs lyrics were pretty tame back then.
Now days you can't get in the car without hearing some form of explicit lyrics on the radio. I've flicked the radio station many-a-time, to avoid their tiny ears hearing things they shouldn't. Fortunately most of them go over the heads of my two kiddies, but that doesn't stop me from cringing when they repeat them.
Driving along in the car one day and my son asked if he could "stay up all night to get lucky". Thank you "Daft Punk".
Another occasion he was simply confused because Rihanna was singing about someone being on fire. He was incredibly worried and asked, "Why is that girl on Fire Mum?"
Their favourite for a while there was Nicki Minaj's "Starships", with the words to "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star" being sung amongst a bunch of bleeped out 'F Bombs'. I must admit, that one was pretty catchy, but after hearing it played over and over again, it lost its amusement pretty quickly.
Luckily most of the songs we have on our play lists are the censored versions. Or so I thought.
All was fine this week until Miss 7 starts singing along to lyrics of a particular Katy Perry song. The words "Sex on the beach" were sang loudly from her bedroom. My ears pricked up, as did every single one of the tiny hairs on the back on my neck!
"We might turn that song off now, hey?"
"Why? ...Because she's singing about things that kids probably shouldn't be listening to, and that's not really a nice thing for a little girls to be singing."
It was at that moment I knew I had put my foot in it.
Because then came "the" question. The question that we parents all fear, but no doubt must answer at some point in time. The question that for me as a child was answered by means of a video called "Where Did I Come From?"
. . ."What's Sex Mummy?"
I've had "how do babies get out of your tummy?" That was awkward, but easy enough. The question of how they get in there in the first place has yet to be raised. That is until I opened my big mouth and stuck my foot in it.
As tactfully as I could and in language fit for a 7 year old, we had our very first birds and the bees talk. . . . All thanks to our friend Katy Perry.
Understandably, it's not all Katy Perry's fault. If I hadn't been such a mummy prude and asked her to stop singing it, I never would have gotten myself into that situation in the first place.
Note to self. Learn to let things go.