The Bachelor's Nikki: Richie shattered my heart
NIKKI Gogan is still mending her broken heart more than three months after tonight's Bachelor finale was filmed.
The Western Australian real estate agent was devastated when Richie Strahan chose single mum Alex Nation over her in the reality dating show's 90-minute grand final.
"Straight after filming wrapped I spent a couple of weeks in Perth with my sister laying low," Ms Gogan told APN.
"I definitely would not have got through the last three and a half months without my sister. She's the light of my life and I needed her."
The 28-year-old said she was blind-sided by Richie's decision after declaring her love for him.
"I wanted it to be me so bad," she said.
"In my mind we were a perfect match and it was just meant to be. I left devastated."
She credited her friends and family for helping her to heal even though most of them did not know the result until tonight's finale aired.
"People have been putting me back together without even realising it. They've been none the wiser of what was going on inside of me," she said.
"I think I've put on a really good front. But in the privacy of my own home living with mum and dad I wouldn't have been a very fun person to live with."
Despite her heartbreak she wished the happy couple all the best in their new life together.
"It's this bizarre situation.The only way I can describe it is I've got my heart split in two," she said.
"Half of it was just aching, but the other half was so genuinely happy for two amazing people. It was so strange to be so hurt and also on the flip side to be so excited for Alex.
"For whatever reason it's meant to be this way."
Ms Gogan, who said she's not ready to start dating again just yet, doesn't regret going on the show.
"If you're going to go into something like this then you've got to put yourself out there; that's what makes it the experience it is," she said.
"I gave it all of me. I think I'm the only one who experienced the full journey. I fell completely in love and got smacked right back down. I had the full highs and lows, but even having my heart shattered I still wouldn't change it. I still had the time of my life. You've got to be yourself and feel all the feels."