TV ads and the things that make you go Ahhh over a bra

© iStockphoto.com/felinda

IT SEEMS I can't turn on the television at the moment and not be bombarded by ads for the amazing, the astounding, the five-for-the-price-of-one Ahh Bra.

It lifts, it encases, it enhances and it's a miracle of modern technology.

Apparently I can now throw out every other piece of lace covered scaffolding in my underwear drawer be- cause this little baby is gonna have me completely covered and pointing in the right direction - literally.

The most "amazing" thing about these advertisements is that in a civilized world, where we have found cures for hideous diseases, climbed every mountain, crossed every sea and explored space, here we still are, on the never ending search for the Holy Grail of fashion - comfortable underwear.

When the first cavemen and women stepped out of their caves you can't tell me they didn't get more than the occasional bit of chafe or dis- comfort as their animal skin clothing rubbed raw in all the wrong places.

I bet bras made out of T- Rex hide didn't have the girls back then jumping up and down for joy.

Talk about a mix up of priorities.

If someone back in those days had spent a little more time at home in the cave and on the sewing machine designing bras and undies rather than running around trying to be involved in evolution, the industrial revolution, the invention of penicillin and the baking of the first Krispy Kreme doughnut we would not still be enduring things like Ahh Bra adverts or the indignities of ill-fitting underwear.

And it's not just bra design that still leaves a lot to be desired, their southern cousins the undies are also under evolved when it comes to comfort and performance.

It doesn't matter whether you buy the $1.99 bargain basement special, waist-high nanna bloomers, cheeky bikini briefs, hipsters, boy-leg styles, high-cut French pan- ties or the overpriced design- er knickers, after a dozen washes you will spend more time and energy digging than was used by Carter in Cairo uncovering the Valley of the Kings.

And the fashion world is still having a laugh over the silliest creation of all, the g- string.

My theory is it was probably invented by some work experience kid goofing off in the studio and the head designer looked at it and said "Why not?

They fell for platform shoes in the '70s and shoulder pads in the '80s, let's give them a 6cm piece of string and tell them it's a pair of knickers".

This week I was shopping with my youngest when I felt some movement.

I had been struggling with a loose bra strap all morning but now my knickers were getting in on the act.

With each step I could feel one side of my knickers making a break for it.

By the time I walked to the back of the shop I was wearing what felt like a g-string even though I certainly hadn't left home wearing one.

In the quiet confines of the back corner of the store I took refuge behind a $16.99 clearance rack to make some "adjustments".

Thinking I was safely out of sight of fellow shoppers I tugged, wriggled and contorted until those knickers were back in the starting position.

It was then I looked up and pretty much at the same time I noticed my youngest's mortally embarrassed face and the image of myself on the in- store security camera.

Seems I had been the unknowing star of my own "Ahh my knickers are finally out of my bum" commercial.

Topics:  bra family taming

Ipswich climber makes it to Everest Base Camp

Beau Stewart is completing the hike of a lifetime in Nepal.

He visited Alice Springs, Tasmania and spots all over south-east Queensland as part...

WATCH: Boxing roos caught on video

QT readers Des and Jen Price captured this confrontation between two male roos in the backyard at Redbank Plains early Monday morning.

Readers capture kangaroos fighting

Burger Urge to open at Redbank Plains

Burger Urge will open in Redbank Plains in 2017.

Popular restaurant announces new store

Local Partners

Workmates honour crash victim with tribute

UPDATE: Tanya Lyell is being remembered as a young mother dedicated to her family and work as the town she called home mourns its loss.

Community garden set for Palmwoods

Kay Nixon at the Palmwoods Community Gardens will be hosting a launch day and inviting the ecommunity to come along and sign up.

Parcel of land to supply sustainable gardening for community

Things to do this week

Dragon play Ipswich Civic Centre on Friday October 28

What's on in Ipswich

Ipswich unites in march for safe world for kids

The streets turn red in one of the previous Walk for Daniel events.

Bruce and Denise continue movement

Kanye West threatens to boycott Grammys

West says he won't go to the Grammys if Frank Ocean's not nominated

Why this actress wasn't embarrassed by nude photo leak

Leslie Jones source Bang

'If you wanna see Leslie Jones naked, just ask,' she said

Festival blooms with Jacaranda trees

BLOOMING GOOD: Cr Paul Tully with the Goodna Jacarandas, in bloom ahead of the upcoming Jacaranda Festival.

This year's festival gets under way on Friday

Dad's Army comic genius Jim Perry dies

Jimmy Perry, the creator of Dad's Army.

Dad's Army series captured all that British people savour

Check out some fashions from the Coast festival

FASHION: Ocean Zen range.

Images from the Sunshine Coast Fashion Festival show what's hot

Things to do this week

Dragon play Ipswich Civic Centre on Friday October 28

What's on in Ipswich

Hinterland horse stud passed in for $8.25 million

UNREAL: This Maleny estate is incredible.

12-bedroom hinterland horse stud still available

Hit songwriter's Noosa mansion on market

SPECIAL PLACE: The Cintamani estate is going to tender, marketed by Tom Offermann Real Estate.

Is this Queensland's best property?

Kiwi siblings snap up Dotcom mansion for $32.5m

The new toy company owners of the Coatesville mansion want replace any controversy with positivity and fun. Photo / Barfoot and Thompson

The trio paid $32.5 million for the property in June

New $200 million development will create 580 jobs

Cassie And Josh with baby Alfie and daughter Andee. They have bought at new Lennox Head development Epiq.

Majority of new positions will be given to Northern Rivers locals

Cherrabah's mega resort plans axed

PLANS for a massive development at Cherrabah have been scrapped.

What our mayor thinks of the new draft SEQPlan

The plan to use the innovative technology as part of the new Maroochydore CBD was cemented on site today when Mayor Mark Jamieson and Envac Asia Region president Chun Yong Ha formally signed the contract for the $20 million underground waste collection system.

New plan accommodates Sunshine Coast Council's vision for growth.