CHRISTMAS is fast approaching and I'm feeling anxious.
Finding the perfect gifts is a mission I take incredibly seriously, because I know too well what getting rubbish presents feels like.
Don't get me wrong, the privilege of being able to give and receive gifts at all is not lost on me, I am incredibly grateful for any gift I receive - it just won't stop me judging it.
To me a rubbish gift has nothing to do with monetary value. It is all about the thought. But if the thought was a stupid one then the gift will inevitably be awful.
Take last Christmas for example.
After weeks of painful Christmas shopping I had a bounty of thoughtful gifts that were sure to impress. Christmas morning came and I could not wait for present time under the tree.
My boyfriend Josh had been secretive about what he had bought me and had spent the last couple of weeks with a smug grin on his face, so I was expecting big things. Shouldn't have.
As I rattled the box he had wrapped for me with my name crudely drawn on in texta I could never have guessed what was inside. A Sodastream.
I thought he must have mislabelled the box but a quick glance in his direction assured me this was not the case.
With the family looking on I fumbled my way through a fake bout of excitement.
"Just what I have always wanted!" Lies.
In fact, up until that point I had gone 26 years never once pining for a Sodastream, 26 blissful years never thinking "Gee I hope that is a Sodastream wrapped under the tree for me instead of some kind of awesome present."
Never mind, I still had one huge gift to open, it was from mum and dad. The box was giant and up until I opened it I had never really understood the expression 'good things come in small packages'.
It was a vacuum cleaner. Not only an incredibly boring gift but also a bit offensive.
Josh whooped with joy and I couldn't understand why.
But it makes sense; if you give bad presents then you probably don't mind receiving them.
Wonder what Josh has in store for me this year...probably something awesome like a jaffle iron.